Homosexuality in the Arab world

by Esra'a (Bahrain)

I read this alarming article this morning. This issue is largely ignored in the region, but it’s nothing uncommon. It was the topic of discussion for a while a few years ago, when a gay Kuwaiti couple got married publicly. I remember my cousin telling me, “this is happening because we are embracing the Western lifestyle and culture without knowing its side effects.” This is nothing new, however, and it’s nothing “caused” by the West. The only difference is that gay people in the West are now more comfortable because they are more broadminded when it comes to such things, making them easier to come out of the closet. Arabs have a huge list of inconveniences and disadvantages to face, giving them no choice but to choose between a forbidden love life and an otherwise ‘normal’ life. The West is a few steps ahead of that.

It’s sad that nothing in the article seems to be exaggerated. I hear stories like that all the time. A woman in my village was once rejected by her boyfriend’s family when they were considering marriage because his brother was gay. Students get kicked out of school and sometimes reported to the police for homosexual (and what is often called “abnormal”) behavior. In Saudi, this is a major problem. I have two friends currently attending high school in Jeddah. Both of them are lesbians. Their reasons? It’s an all-girls school, making it easier to find love with each other than with men, who they hardly have a chance to meet. These girls understand the severity of the issue, that’s why almost all of them keep it a secret. Quite literally, their life depends on it. This of course applies to gay boys as well, as they are the ones who pass on the family’s name. A family’s reputation means a lot in the Arab world. Whoever stains their family’s name usually has to pay, and in places like Palestine and Jordan, certain families would have the right to commit an ‘honor’ killing – something that unfortunately still exists.

Islam’s take on this issue is not a simple one, I find it hard to believe that there will be no exceptions at all. In boarding school, the only Muslim who fasted with me during Ramadhan was gay. I don’t think this loving, helpful, and caring guy could ever be destined for hell simply because of the choice he made. An attraction is out of one’s control. If they really had a choice, they would pick something less threatening, but sometimes you can’t help but be yourself.

There is nothing wrong with two people of the same sex wanting to commit. No one has the right to disallow people in love from taking their normal, functioning relationship up to another level. It would cause nothing but unhappiness and further pandemonium if everyone continued calling homosexual relationships “a mockery” and homosexuals “sinners.” Regardless of their sexual preferences, they are still people who should be afforded the same rights as other people whose preferences may be different from theirs. Really, it’s that simple. To quote a shirt I saw, “if you don’t like gay people, don’t sleep with them.” If you disagree with it because you’re a Muslim, fine. Just don’t shove your personal beliefs and opinions down everybody else’s throats. Our job is to advise them. Their job is to make the decision. And once they do, we need to accept it.

I don’t understand people who think they’re good enough to know who gets to go to heaven and who gets to go to hell, even if it’s implied in the Koran. Nothing in the Koran is for certain; it’s an accepted fact that there are many different ways of interpreting it. If someone knew for sure that someone else was going to Hell then why don’t they just replace God so that they can make the rest of His decisions? Let’s just hire an Imam. Wouldn’t that be easier for everybody? We wouldn’t even have to wait until Judgment Day. Imams are right – homosexuality is in fact a disease that makes the process of elimination easier. No, really, there is a boiling vat of oil reserved for them in the afterlife. I know it. It says so in the KORAN! Somewhere! I read it so many times, I just can’t remember which Surrah, but it’s there! Oh, and Jews are stupid! They burn things! One of Prophet Mohammed’s closest friends was Jewish, and even though the Prophet never tried to kill him, he SHOULD have, ’cause he might’ve been gay! Come on, where’s your logic! Einstein once said that Earth was created for Muslims! Everybody else should get their trench coat and leave! I know it, it’s in the KORAN! Ask any Imam in your area! Ask any gay person! Oh wait, they wouldn’t know, they’re stupid! It says so in the KORAN! They’ll go to hell! I know it! Hip hip, hooray!

Seriously, people need to get a grip. Heterosexual marriages exist mainly to keep populating the human race, but isn’t China taking care of that? Accepting gay people won’t change the foundations of society. Gays are and will always be a minority. Just because people will be more vocal about it doesn’t mean that Elton John would write the soundtrack of our lives. It means that some people made a different decision for themselves, and whether or not it was a “wise” one is up to them. Maybe they have a different relationship with God, too. We’ll never know, and we need to stop acting like we do. Having more gay communities in the Arab world won’t harm anybody, including our Muslim culture. Whether you like it or not, gay people will most likely stay gay. We can either punish them for something they find impossible to control, or accept them and be tolerant of their sexual orientation and beleifs. I choose the latter.

Below is a list of sites regarding homosexual life in the Middle East: