Homosexuality in the Arab world: Interview with gay rights activist
Here’s my interview with a homosexual activist.
Hello, I’m a 25 year old Lebanese, from the beautiful land of the cedars. I guess it’s no surprise I’m Queer, Gay, homosexual; I fall for other men. It has not been the easiest thing, born in a country where homosexuality is a sin and a crime. I think I managed to survive. At least until now. The hardest part is all the offence you had to hear while growing up, hearing how your family discriminate gays, without knowing that one of their members (if not more then one) is in fact, Gay.
Q. What sort of rights would you like to see homosexuals in the Arab world have?
A.I do not believe in homosexual rights. I believe we have a serious problem in the Arab world with human rights. What we are missing nowadays, is the basic rights for a human being to be recognized as a human being! Discrimination faces everyone, everywhere. There is no single place where you will be treated as a human because you simply are one. Gay rights is no exception.Q. How would these rights apply in strict Muslim cultures, especially since the Koran doesn’t speak in favor of homosexuality?
A. If you search Gay on google.com with search results, you will get that 10% of the IP’s that entered the keyword ‘gay’ on the search engine comes from Saudi Arabia. 8 out of the top 10 are Arabic countries.If you want to interpret the result, we can do so in many ways, however I prefer not to, and to let the reader stop and think about this fact.
The same implies on the “paltalk” gay room. The only room with full attendance all the time, is GayArab.
Q. Are there any official anti-homosexual laws where you live? Did you ever experience any form of discrimination?
A. Yes and no. Yes there is an official anti-homosexual law in Lebanon which prohibits unusual sexual intercourse. Even though it does not clearly specify “homosexuality” it was been used in numerous cases against homosexuals. No, I didn’t face any form of discrimination since I am only out to close friends, and rare are those that knows about my homosexuality. Besides I do not look gay (or I try not to).Q. What would you have to risk in order to declare yourself as a homosexual?
A. Let’s start: Family rejection, job rejection, half of your friends will flee you, your dad will have a heart attack, your mom will go to the mental hospital, your brother will prevent you visiting him (I actually did hear that from his mouth while discussing with him).To sum it up, if you want to declare yourself as a homosexual, better go live in Europe.
Q. In your opinion, do you think homosexuality is a choice, or is it who you are (as in, something you can’t change?)
A. It is who I am, and I am proud of what I am. It is a just a different taste.Q. Where do people get the idea that homosexuality is a “disease,” and how do you reply to such a claim?
A. You have to witness a live psychological massacre I commit. Well I aboard the subject from their point of view, I place myself in their shoes to prove them wrong. It always works because people spit out what they were fed. It is rare that they speak out their convictions.Q. Where do people get the idea that homosexuality is a “disease,” and how do you reply to such a claim?
A. You have to witness a live psychological massacre I commit. Well I aboard the subject from their point of view, I place myself in their shoes to prove them wrong. It always works because people spit out what they were fed. It is rare that they speak out their convictions.Q. Do you proudly declare the fact that you’re gay to people? Once you tell people that you’re gay, or if they find out somehow, does your relationship/friendship with them get awkward or are people generally understanding and open-minded?
A. Concerning the persons I came out to, I do it with my head high. They often feel sorry when I come out, but then they realize I am better in my head then they are. Most of them wants me to try sleeping with a girl, which is practically impossible.All the people that I came out too were more then understanding even though some where homophobes and now they defend hard the fact homosexuality is just another sexual orientation.
However a story is to tell. I had a best friend for over 4 years. We practically spent all our time together, we shared the same university, courses, friends, life, I was unable to come out too, afraid I will loose him knowing the religious person he is. With time, he found out, and it practically destroyed our friendship. He wanted to change me in all means a person can try. From my brotherhood love to him, I followed his advices, the result 5 years from that we speak once a year, I faced the ugliest era of my life, depression followed another depression trying to fake who I was. Add to it, I forced myself to date a girl which fell in love with me, and I didn’t have any single feeling towards her. All that, just to try to adapt to society norms so that you won’t loose your best friend.
I believe in the beautiful person that I am, with all the differences I behold in the eye of other human beings.
Q. Finally, as a gay rights activist, do you think your goals will ever be met? Especially since civil rights in general are hardly applied in most Arab states?
A. Not in my lifetime perhaps, but it will definitely be met some day. In Europe 100 years ago homosexuality was alike nowadays in the Arab countries. Today homosexual adoption is being legalized throughout Europe. We’re not far of that, specially with the globalisation each country is facing.Love really has no limits.
Thanks for doing this. I hope it’ll enlighten some narrow-minded people out there.
My pleasure…

Join the Conversation
A gay person, in my religous view, has valuable soul, no different from any other human. However homosexuality is a cloud, obscuring the sun’s direct rays on the mirror of that soul, just as any other cloud obscures the rays of the sun. Just as my weak points obscure the rays of the sun of truth. Homosexuality is not the same as male and female. It isn’t a 3rd way. We should treat everyone with respect, but just as adultery is a cloud over the mirror of our souls, so is homosexuality. I know some really nice people who committed adultery. If by some situation I am asked to forgive him/her, I can do that. The same principle should apply to homosexuality.
I don’t understand what do you want to say here? Homosexuality should be welcomed in the Arab World? Homosexuality is a disease, these people are sick, we should help them, but to give gays and lesbians the right to start their own association or homosexuality community that will be ridiculous!!
Have you read the newspapers lately, are you aware of the number of crimes and sick things people started doing? Videoing a member of your own family, your own blood or a neighbour in the bathroom or raping a sister or a daughter!! Its disgusting.. This is the only word I find appropriate.
I’m not saying it should be encouraged. I’m saying it should be tolerated. And homosexuality isn’t a disease. For many, it’s an uncontrollable want or need, especially when you risk losing your family and the rest of your loved ones over it. Do you think people “choose” or want that? Do you know how much trauma your average gay person in the Middle East is forced to face? How is that fair?
What does this have to do with gay rights? I’m not talking about rape. I’m talking about two people of the same sex expressing their love for each other, while maintaining their role in an otherwise sheltered society. How does acknowledging such rights harm us?
If you don’t like homosexuality, don’t be gay, and don’t limit someone else’s right to be gay, whether be it by choice or not. It’s none of your business. Let people do what they want without declaring their choices or identity as “disgusting.”
Gotta’ recommend the film “Trembling Before G-d” http://www.tremblingbeforeg-d.com/
It’s about gay orthodox Jews struggling with their homosexuality. I have to admit, the premise did not interest me that much, but the result is brilliant and relevant.
Ooooh… and look what else I found on their site: a new film about homosexuality and Islam.
http://www.tremblingbeforeg-d.com/inthenameofallah/invite.html
Thank you Esther for these useful links!
I shared a house with several gay guys in Atlanta in the 1970′s. I stayed there about 8 or 9 months. It was a real learning experience lol, I couldn’t help but type that line, No seriously folks, we shouldn’t discriminate against people with AIDS or any spiritual disease, I am all for compassion, mercy, help, toleration, but its not normal or healthy. Unfortunately the state of our spiritual-techno civilization is that we aren’t to successful with certain problems and homosexuaality is one of them. However alot of these guys and girls, are really creative artists, and even the average joes, or johns should be given a little slack, they should be allowed to live their lives as normally as possible with the same rights, AND responsibilities, as everyone ELSE.
EdoRiver, please do *not* equate being gay with afultery- the first is a state of being, the other is betrayal of trust- and no, extra-marital sex in “open” mariage isn’t adultery as far as I am concerned.
Please define normal?For the sake of the following argument I’ll assume it in the strictly mathematical sense(i.e. average, of the norm).I know several gay people- they’re as normal as most of my friends otherwise(OTOH I hang mostly with the SF&F and RPG crowd:).Gay people can be found in all walks of life, from artists and poets to lawyers to scientists.They’re simply part of our society and our people- as intrinsic to the human state as dark haired(or blond) people are.I never understood why what two consenting adults do in privacy is a matter for *anyone* as long as nobody is being hurt.
Any god that creates people who desire members of their sex and then slaps them for following the will He gave them is not a god I am willing to worship- OTOH I have yet to see the institutional god I’ll be willing to worship:I’m agnostic going on atheistic:).
Living in the present european situation, I forget that we came from so far… Reading some of your comments I realised what homosexuals had to support in Europe 50 years ago…
For me, having several homosexual friends and defining them not by this characteristic but by their own individual character, work, interests, human qualities or defaults, some of your sentences are really shocking.
Treating as a whole all homosexuals as for example, being, because of this status, cause of rape orviolence, or being synomym of aids is for me exactly the same as saying in my country that if someone was agressed, it was more probably by an north african/arab and deciding, based on this assumption, without any check, to reject all the muslims communitee in a whole, whithout any distinction…
If you’re shocked by such reaction against arabs or muslims, you’re right ! But, then, don’t do the same with homosexuals !!! They are just as all other “group” people.. some are really nice… some are realy bad… some heve huge qualities… some are just devil…
would like to join you,,pls adv ASAP,,
Best warm regards,
Mohamed – Mohamed
Abu Dhabi – UAE
Butterfly, I don’t understand your point.
You are clearly against homosexuality, and I get that. But what does raping one’s sister and video-taping relatives have to do with being a homosexual?
Surely you’re not saying homosexuality drives one to these kinds of crimes?
There are straight sick perverts just as there are gay ones. I don’t think being gay makes you more likely to commit a crime.
Ehh…
People are born homosexual.
Stop thinking that they “turn” gay or “choose” to be gay.
Education and science can help you.
Have fun.
Don’t listen to “Butterfly,” check the IP. It’s the same girl/dude who kept harassing us for about a month.
Butterfly, fly away…..
Would like to join you,
best regards,
Mohamed
!! I read some of your comments…. Being gay is some how bad but its somebody’s choice not the government, Simple advice:If the Arab world doesnt Accept you please do come down here in Africa we do not have rules against gays !!! Its an open world down here we live free..
I have read the interview and all the comments and some of you people dont know what in the world your talking about. Being “gay” is NOT wrong! If you think it is, then being YOU is wrong, because there is no difference. Dont we all eat drink walk talk the same? Yes we do, so just because we are attraced to the same sex makes us different? No, it makes you ignorant. I’m an Arab and yes i’m a Lesbian and i’m proud of it. I hold my head up high and say it.
Its not a damn diease, if it is then that means “gays” have the right to say that “stright” are sick too? No. I keep quoteing it because i dont believe in labels i think we are all people who need to be respected and accepted, if you dont like it then kill your self because everywhere you go you will meet someone who is gay. The money you touched had been touched by just about everyone you can label.
Arab, American, Hispanic, whatever you’re from….People are people, if you want to be accepted….Accpet others.
-New Yorker’s Les
NewYorkersLes Wrote
Good for you NewYorkerLes, the sooner people realize that we are all one human race, in this life together, the sooner we will stop the conditions that cause psychological damage to our fellow human beings. I hate the way we treat each other out of superstition, taboo and bigotry.
Pingback: 5 homosexual men sentenced to 3 years of prison in Egypt - Mideast Youth - Thinking Ahead
trust me all.
people are born gay an Im a perfect example for that. i lived my hall life with Stright people and family in gulf and as a muslim woman its forbedin to be gay even in my society but to be honest we have lots of people hiding in a closet because of that and they dont have thier freedom no one talks about it. its a petty that no one is doing anything about it.
regards
Susan
Susan, This is an old post, so I don’t feel bad linking to a post from 1 year ago that you might want to read.
Here is a short excerpt:
I think being gay is something the Arab people try to ignore talking about cos they refuse to believe that we do exist in their everyday lives, its been here since the dawn of century but the Arabs choose not to believe what is real..
being a homosexual isnt a disease, it’s not “nashaz” it’s like saying that heterosexual is a disease, thats absurd allow me to say..
Love goes beyond Gender, Religion or Age..
i think everyone is secretly a bisexual, u show appreciation to a person of his/her outside look, hair, eyes or even the personality.. thats no difference..
we as homosexuals are human too and we deserve rights just as u guys do, we’re not hurting u nor causing problems in fact some famous gay people achieved alot of huge accomplishments worldwide, why cant u just live and let live ?
we are here to stay so u will have to accept us.
I just returned from Jordan and Syria and was surprised how close the men are to each other, walking hand in hand down the street and profuse cheek kissing and hugging. Something I do not see in my Western society. Some of these men was obviously gay, which made me wonder if being gay in Islam is tolerated as long as you do not flaunt it. Before homosexuality was removed as illegal, arrests also took place in my country ( South Africa), but very rarely and I only ever heard of it. I never experienced Police brutality for being gay. For other things, like political demonstrations yes, but never about being gay.
Is it not the same is more moderate Arab states?
Ahh, okay i think being gay is something your born with. I dont know why but i happen to check out guys more than girls. I mean i love to be with girls and check them out too but sometimes guys more? I have no idea what to do and im very confused. I dont want to have anything to do with a guy because my family would literally disown me and possibly kill me! Ever since i was a kid i wanted to marry a girl and have a ton of kids, and i still do but i dont know if im bisexual or just curious, or both. I’m afraid to talk to anyone about it and this is the first time ive ever said or wrote anything about this and im afraid to do or say anything because im a Catholic from Iraq and sometimes i wanna blame the church for teaching us not to have sex with girls, which they should gay girls and guys. One preist did tell us that its okay to be gay as long as you dont commit adultery. I dunno guys. If anyone has any posotive feedback that would be great. Thanks for reading.
Look, it is being scientifically proved that people are born gay or straight. It has nothing to do with your upbringing or influences from your childhood. Many people deny being gay mainly because they are afraid or simply do not know about it. To his dying day my father never acknowledged me being gay, but we got along fine. We just never discussed sexuality. This is how an old fashioned man coped with a gay son. It did help that I am not militant and did not want to force the issue. So, what I am saying is that you have your own life to live. Don’t try to force issues in your restricted society, but go on living your own life – even if it means moving away from your family for a while. As you and your family gets older, things becomes easier and these issues are not so important anymore. My own brother (who married a Muslim woman), as a young man swore that he would knock me down if he heard that I was gay, but he did nothing of the sort. He just quietly accepted it and we are civil to each other.
Do not restrain your own freedom and happiness because you are scared of society. Be brave, be responsible and let God take you where you are meant to go. Life has a srange habit of happening while we are making other plans.And don’t listen to priests. They are not supposed to support homosexuality.
I have commented on this before and i just have one thing to say to Iraq
Dont feel bad, im from Iraq and guess what? im not straight. I just want to let you know, your not alone. =]!!
New Yorker’s Les
why did u delete that guys comment?
fuckk him, and i think it should be pointed out that hes on a GAY FORUM, HMMMMM I WONDER WHY?? dont delete this, and let him reply to it cuz he wants to be mr. strong behind a computer screen. Fuck u dudee
The problem with you is that you do not want to admit that you are not normal, you need help !!! yes you are ill !!! that is the truth and you should admit it and face it.
You can not say that you want your right for being against nature, for being not normal, but you can say we want help, then we can understand.
If being homosexual is not wrong,then how is life can continue ??? Tell me can two of same kind give new life ??
Please at least do not make it easy for other persons to be not normal because you can not admit, even to yourself, that you are ill and need help.
That is my opinion, I hope you will understand it.
May God help you
Actually, homosexuality does exist in the natural, non-human, world. There are many documented cases.
Not every living being is required for the continuation of life. In fact, one could easily argue that 100% reproduction is unsustainable. So, you might say that childless people are an absolute requirement for sustainability and for a healthy planet.
who ever says that homosexuality is disgusting and its a disease, i feel sorry for him/her. homosexuality is not wrong its part of nature, like there’s different races like African, Chinese, etc, there is also bi’s, gays, & lesbians. there’s different eye colors to human beings, green, blue, brown and so is sexual orientation.
there is so much evidence, scientific evidence that homosexuality is natural, but even when proofs as such that are 100% true represented to people like you, you choose to be ignorant, ignorance is the human beings greatest enemy, greater than the Satan.
i hope GOD heals the minds and souls of people like you Butterfly.
Homosexuality is not a mental disease or a social disease it’s a variation in human sexuality and have been prooved scientificly. People are ignorant and have a problem form homophobia and from negative religous and social critisicim. Homosexuality has nothing with raising children in a good and positivly oriented way, it’s more factor of genetic, hormonal during pragnency, social factor are not very important. 10 million child are being raised in the united states by gay/lesibian parents and have normal life. so why we don’t understand the problem and we take it from others point of vues. Homosexuality has nothing with prostitution, I can be homosexual and prostitute and I can be homosexual and love one person in all my life, I can alsow be heterosexual and prositute. Don’t have limits in your brain and don’t be a victim to your homophobia because it’s the disease, homophobia is certain kind of phobias and should be treated, it can lead to more resistant anxiety disorders like HOCD( homosexual obssesive complsive disorders) or panic attack, or to GAD (general anxiety disorder) if we have a tendency to these disease. I am expert in clinical psychology and have made a lot of research in sexual orientation and social interaction.
Hello everyone, I think that in my personal opinion, the separation and the tabu that is being “openly gay” in a muslim country, make some man go to europe or america marry european or american girls, and then they think that is ok to go and have a boyfriend and have sex outside the marriage, because their european or american wife will never find out and their family in their muslim country is going to think that he is a respectable men with wife and kids. The big mayority prefers to live a double life because they are cowards at the end of the day.
I’m not sure if the last comment that was made is with or against homosexuals. But, nobody has to live a double, some might have to because of their family in the Arab world. I don’t live a double, my arabic family do know that I’m gay, however its just not spoken about.
Why gay people have to be afraid and ashamed from who they really are ? Okay people who are against gay people,answer this : I have feelings for men,how come ??? I mean seriously I CANT CONTROL WHO I FALL IN LOVE WITH !!!! I just can’t,and I swear to god if anyone pull this “gay is a sickness” crap on me I will trash talk !
BUT , what I do know too is being gay is forbidden,if it was not we wouldn’t be talking here in the first place ! so gay people are afraid and ashamed because it’s forbidden ! We walk around like we’re steeling or something..and when we’re sitting with our family and friends we agree with them that gay people are ugly,well they are not,I am a good person,I am,I respect others,I pray,I don’t lie,I don’t hurt others,I am a good person,but here in arab world,if ur a good person and ur gay ? the good person part doesn`t count,they see just the gay ugliness part,while gay people are beautifull.I tried not to be gay many times,it didnt work and i tried very hard.I tried because I’m afraid of god,cuz life is not eternal,but still what about life ? I think people should be who they really are,and show themselves without shame,fear and guilt.this is just sad ! But one thing is SURE and nobody could take it away from me! If a friend of mine,a family member or even a stranger open up to me and told me he or she is gay,I WILL RESPECT THEM.I don´t treat people differently because of their religion,color,race,sexual orientation,gender,age,cuz we are the same.
Thank u all…
All of you people are fickle minded its really sad how the human society thinks these days.Same sex relations is a Sin in Gods eyes thats all that matters.God made woman for man and man for woman period. Being homosexual is a addiction for a feeling thats not normal but feels good. We has humans go by what the flesh wants and not whats right and wrong.How do you think God would ever accept this.Think about it.For Example.I have a Gay male cousin and when I see him with his male mate It does’nt even look normal He pretends to be a girl and he’s not,Same with Gay woman they some are prentending to a Man when their not.I am a girl and my Flesh have had thoughts of being with a woman but I know its not right it would’nt even feel right other than the feeling of Sex.Think about that.God bless
I am 16. And I think that homosexuality is something that nobody did arrange themselves to happen. It is a natural phenomenon, having been possessed by somebody. It is sort of like a load in the soul. If you neglect such, it will remain as a weigh in your system drastically affecting your life as you live. If you accept it and try to lift it up; then emotional, psychological and mostly spiritual enlightenment would surely be realized. I also believe that it can never be hidden for good. Perhaps, there would always be that point where everything kept would just explode and blow up! The more you deprive, the worse the craving gets. I myself is gay by the way. So, obviously, I have had focused on the realization of my gay traits even before I got 16. Actually, I am fortunate enough to gush that everything was never been that complicated. now i am living happily my life.