Voting: Wisdom Not Necessary
The other day I was accosted by one of those damn college students with a cause. I cant stand those little punks, dont get me wrong, causes have their purpose and someone has to fight them but if I talk to another amateur student tree hugger who doesnt know a damn thing about their cause well I just might do something drastic like register for the Army and beg them to send me to Iraq!
This time it was someone begging a bunch of people (including myself) to register to vote. A good cause, no disagreements here but this girl had that look of naive ignorance in her eyes. You know that look of “eating animals is morally wrong but I have leather seats in my VW.” Anyways she started preaching and unfortunately because of the circumstances I couldn’t quite escape her so I used the strategy you apply when you see an ex girlfriend in public…avoid eye contact! As you might already know, avoiding eye contact makes you immediately noticed.
She comes up to me and says…
Stupid girl: Would you like to register?
Yours Truly: I’m already registered.
Stupid girl: Yea right! You dont vote.
Not only is this girl naive, ignorant and dumb but shes rude too.
Yours Truly: I think you need to work on your approach. Do you even know who you’re voting for? Wait let me guess, Barack Obama right?
Stupid girl: Actually yes.
Yours Truly: How did I guess? Do you know anything about Barack Obama, did you know he’s the Anti-Christ?
Stupid girl: What? The anti-Christ? What are you talking about?
Yours Truly: Listen Carefully, Barack Obama is the Anti-Christ!
Stupid girl: How so?
Yours Truly: The guy is running on a platform based on opposing U.S. involvement in Iraq right?
Stupid girl: Yea.
Yours Truly: And he’s already suggested attacking Iran before it was fashionable which wasnt big news and he’s suggested attacking Pakistan with ground troops which was big news.
Stupid girl: What!? I dont believe you! You’re making that up.
Yours Truly: Not only that but hes an admitted cocaine user. Sounds like the anti-Christ to me.
Stupid girl: Well who are you gonna vote for?
Yours Truly: The only person worth voting for and trustworthy enough to not invade Iran is Ron Paul but he doesn’t have a chance in hell.
Stupid girl: Who? Ive never heard of him.
Yours Truly: Wow, really? You dont even know the candidates! Why dont you do some research before you hit the streets registering people to vote when you dont know shit. You’re more of a threat to this country than if you were unregistered.
Unfortunately people like her are more common than uncommon…and thats how George Bush gets elected twice.
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So funny.
November 5th…
“The only person worth voting for and trustworthy enough to not invade Iran is Ron Paul but he doesn’t have a chance in hell.”
Damn right; if Ron Paul isn’t elected, you can expect war and bankruptcy.
People are starting to take him seriously, too; so do us a favor and knock-off the longshot-canard.
Heh..it’s mean to crack open the lil hippies minds…people should vote regardless, tho. Our recent provincial election in Ontario only drew 55% of eligible voters! And I’ll bet most of them were retirees. The polling station I went to was sadly typical: All the election officials were older women (God bless the civic-minded senior citizen) and only 1 party out of 5 had bothered to place a monitor to watch. I was the youngest voter there at 5:30PM, and I’m an old mans compared to most of u pups. On the way home I stopped to get a coffee and asked the young cashier if she voted. She just looked at me, and said, “for what?”
For a nation currently shooting at other people over the principle of democracy, I find that just pathetic. So, even if the hippies annoy you with their DUHmocratic zeal, be kind…at least they’re paying some attention…
Thats what was so awesome about Stephen Colbert attempting to run.. People, young people started to pay attention.