Palestinian-Israeli Chanukah/Eid celebration at my home
My friend at work was making fun of my “To Do” lists which have like 30 items for me to do in one day. “You ought to see a psychiatrist. You’re mad!!”
My kids though, think I’m crazy for entirely different reasons. My Complainer Daughter was bothered a little that I was having an interfaith chanukah party with Arabs and Jews. Why can’t I be like other mothers and just have Jews at the party? Why must we be an embarrassment to the neighborhood?
“Don’t talk about Arabs to Natty (her boyfriend). He doesn’t like Arabs.”
Well, that, of course, prompted me to go over to him and talk some sense into the young man of Moroccan ancestry.
”I hear you don’t like Arabs. We’re having a party tonight and you are invited. I used to think just like you. You know why you don’t like them, don’t you? It’s because it is what you were taught. You’ve never had Arab friends and all your friends say they hate Arabs so you hate them too, aren’t I right?”
He nodded.
I also dared to invite some locals from my neighborhood. These were old friends who I know never had contact with Palestinians. There was a Palestinian from Abu Dis whom I never met who is on my email list and got the invite. Surprisingly he said he’d like to come and bring a friend or two. Great. At least we’ll have some diversity.
By the time the party was supposed to begin,the apartment shone and I lit candles all over the place to make that warm and fuzzy mood. The Abu Dis guys called. I thought they’d have problems at the entrance check point but didn’t. They were lost so I had to guide them through. In fact, everyone got lost. No one’s been to my new pad before plus it’s a new neighborhood so it was quite a challenge for me to explain directions to people, since I’m no good at them myself. Turns out the Abu Dis guy brought in a friend from Jenin who told me he had never been invited to a Jewish home before and he seemed so delighted to be in my house. Even in Maaleh Adumim. Settlement, shmettlement. There.
He was intrigued by the uncovered mezuzot I had on my door frames and I explained the Moses and Egypt story to him, so he could understand the origin of this. “the prayer inside is the same prayer as you have…Lah Il’ha Il Allah - there is no God but Allah” - “Shma Israel - the Lord is One.” He smiled.
One of the Jewish guys came over to me and said “I’d been to Jenin.” “Oh yeah?” “Yeah, in a jeep. With a gun.” he whispered to me. Yikes. Better not say that too loud. And I was pleased that he was here because next time, he may not want to go into Jenin in an army uniform with a gun, if he gets to know some of the locals.
My daughter and her boyfriend were going out on the town and walked towards the door. I intercepted and introduced them to the guests. The happy Jenin guy looked at Natty, thinking perhaps he was an Arab because well, many Moroccans just do. “Kif Halak!!” He grabbed Natty’s hand shaking it hard and smiling widely. I see Natty’s face getting all red. He can’t get out of this one. The Jenin guy continued to talk to him in Arabic. I thought I would pee in my pants - I found it hilarious. I explained that Natty doesn’t know Arabic, his name is Hebrew - short for Netanel. “Have a great evening kids!” I said as I closed the door behind them.
It was time to light the Chanukah menorah and we said the blessings and sang Maoz Tzur while my friend played guitar. I was frying sweet potato latkes (pancakes) and the Jenin guy pointed and said “levivot!” the Hebrew word for what they are. He googled Chanukah, wanting to come prepared. I thought that was really sweet.
Meanwhile, I introduced everyone to each other. Haj Ibrahim came in traditional Arab dress. Some of my right-wing Jewish Orthodox friends were there and shook hands with my Palestinian buddies and they were wrapped up in conversation on my couch and standing in the kitchen. I told my Jewish friends that we don’t talk politics so we don’t get angry, we will just celebrate together. And I think we were all relieved we didn’t have to point fingers and yell and scream at each other. But then again, my house isn’t the Israeli Knesset.
I then asked the guy from Jenin if he would like to speak about the upcoming Moslem holiday Eid Al Adha so my Jewish friends could learn something about it. I actually made Makhlouba to celebrate and people actually liked it. Of course, the Jewish folks had no idea what it was but everyone seemed to enjoy it, except for the vegetarians.
I thought the party would end at a reasonably early hour, but guests left at 11:30 pm instead. People were making connections and exchanging numbers and emails. And I wasn’t tired. It’s funny how happiness could give you that wonderful burst of energy.
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Excellent article Leah! I was hoping to see some pictures.
So that’s the trick… everything seems decent once politics is removed out of the equation.
It’s a great story Leah. You took a chance and you made something happen, when others would walk away. You bet on the commonality we all share, and the bet paid off. And you wisely stayed away from politics. But let me ask you this: If you had chosen to talk politics, what would it have taken to bring civility to that conversation? What has to happen, for people to be rational about matter which stir irrational emotions? What words would you have used?
Leah, You lit the candles of menorah with the heat of love, Happy Hanuka! I hope we have beautiful days ahead, with brave and innovative people like you, who challenge themsevles and rhe society to come to a point of appriciation and freidnship. I wish I was there too. This year, Hanuka, Christmas and Eid Qurban are perhaps very close the one another regarding their dates, it could be very symbolic, very inspiring. Be well
Hope to download photos in a few hours….If we had chosen to talk about politics, I guess everyone would have been civil because it was in my house, but politics make people angry and defensive. It stirs up so much emotion. I think just plain simple get togethers like this show that the Other can be as human. A Buddhist told me there will be real peace once we do not see each other as the “other” but as the same. Politcs would have roused up a whole lot of uncomfortable questins about the fence, green line, our land, your land, our history, your history. No one ever gets anywhere with that. We just simply have to meet as human beings and that de-demonizes the other. I really believe that that Israeli guy who went into Jenin as party of the Israeli army will think twice about going into “excursions” there when he gets to know a few more very nice people from Jenin. That’s when you start putting down arms and saying “I don’t want to do this anymore.” This is one of the goals I guess…..
And I wrote this so fast….excuse the couple of typos…
Good story…
I like what you have to say, and what the Buddhist had to say. We will begin to move toward peace when we begin to see “The Other” as “Ourselves.” Why do we convince ourselves that we are so different from one another. Aren’t we all brought into this world in the same way? Don’t we all have to be fed and clothed when we are young? And when we grow up, don’t we all need the help that comes when people care for one another as much as they care for themselves?
Chanukah is a holiday of light. How appropriate then that you were able to bring a small glimmer of light into what otherwise would be a very dark world indeed.
hajj ibrahim!! i miss him.. that sounds like a nice evening.
Hi Leah,
Nice write up of what I’m sure was a nice evening, sorry I missed it by that much, look forward to the invitation to your next one! (tho I don’t promise I’ll be able to make it:-)
Love,
[one of] your right wing friend[s],
Gidon
A very nice post:-)