And it is not reasonable that Islam obliges women to dress in a certain way for the rest of their lives because there are some men who are sick. This kind of thinking belongs to humans not to Allah the Wise and MercyFull.

Men are not naturally sexually driven. Men have sexual drives, but they are not always driven by sex. Men have sexual drives naturally but they become sexually driven through growing up experiences and learnings.

Finally to say that looking at a women naturally means going out with her for chat can only come from a sexually driven mind. of course there is no problem with going out with a women as a friend or colleague , but of course this can only be done by men who can look at a women as a human.

Men are not naturally sick; some are nurtured to being sexually obsessed, and others are directed towards a more balanced stance.

They are naturally sexually driven. That’s not only male humans. God had put that in males to insure that they don’t extinct. Islam is a complete system that takes that and direct it the right way. Through mirage and the way it defines the relationship between males and females. The way your raised doesn’t change your nature it just controls it.

You said God told men not to look at women, but He also told women not to look at men; does that mean women can only see men as sexual objects?

No, It’s just for a different reason witch is women can be attracted to a man’s strength, personality or any other reason. Go ask a girl that is in love with a boy. Why does she feel that way? mostly not always she’ll answer something other than that he’s hot or handsome. But ask the same for a boy you’ll get a reply – again not always – that she’s hot. That’s the plain truth. It’s not right but that’s how it is.

In any case the verse doesn’t tell us not to look, rather not to glare or stare with wrong intentions; but it allows natural looks.

Islam – I don’t know where you got your info from – does allow the accidental look that happened with out your well. It doesn’t allow natural looks. Because simply who can know what your intentions are – other than god-. If what you say is correct that means I can take a foreign girl to a restaurant and have a “natural” chat and fun. What the hell man. Don’t get me wrong man I’m not saying these are my opinions. This is Islam take it or leave it.
iSNZ

People are not fair, life has nothing to do with it … and since its people then its you, others and I, and when the case is such then we have to do something.
Men are not naturally sick; some are nurtured to being sexually obsessed, and others are directed towards a more balanced stance. Sex has and will always be an issue; but to say that men can only look at women as sexual objects is far fetched. Men are not by nature sexual predators, men grow up to being that because of the way we are brought up. When you grow in a house that teaches you that women are only sexual objects there will be no way that you see them any other way.

Rasha’s important post points to some of the ways where men are taught that women are only bodies for their pleasure; and where women are taught that they should consider themselves as a source of sexual satisfaction for men. Men grow up thinking of women sexually, and women grow up thinking that their ultimate value lies in being desired.
Either way this is not healthy and is not natural.

You said God told men not to look at women, but He also told women not to look at men; does that mean women can only see men as sexual objects? In any case the verse doesn’t tell us not to look, rather not to glare or stare with wrong intentions; but it allows natural looks. God created us, and He didn’t create us in ways that don’t allow normal healthy interaction.

There is so much to say in this sensitive and important topic; a good place to start is to understand the concept of the “social construction of sexuality”. this is an issue of critical importance and it give us a great deal of understanding about the gap that exists between the physiological sexual attractions and desires; and about the way socialisation magnifies that and shapes it into what it is.

All the very best.

The passport control officer hardly looked or talked to me making me feel filthy.

Hope the point is clear now.
iSNZ

Men … think of women as sexual things that haven’t changed and it will never do … Men will lie and say that they have good intentions but take from me they don’t. Men by nature are sexual predators.

Well, I do not deny the reality and strength of sexual desire, male or female, but as a man I do not subscribe to this sweeping generalization. Believe me, it really is possible for men to look at women without being distracted by sexual desire. We are part animal, but the animal can be tamed and trained by what some call our spiritual side, without necessarily violating our ‘nature’.

I am part of a religious community that has strict rules on sexual relationships and chastity, but which has mixed religious services and administrative bodies. I can and will not pry into other’s minds, but you know what: the men behave wonderfully well !

I do know it can be a struggle but hey, do not say it’s impossible. Be kind to the animal but strictly control it. Use a bit of humour, a dose of wisdom and focus on the spiritual side of life. You’ll be rewarded

Warmest greetings

dont know what 2 say—only pity u

I don’t feel that “pity” is the right word. Rasha is an inspirational example of women in our time who are standing up in defense of their rights instead of accepting their situation silently, if anything this is admirable and not anything that invites “pity.”

When people, especially women, write about these things, it’s not because we are requesting for pity. We are doing it for the sake of awareness and to show that we are not going to stand by and allow people to mock our worth and limit our societial opportunities. We are slowly but surely gaining our rights and this process is unstoppable.

We write about these things and condemn them publicly because we are hopeful for change. I don’t think that anyone here is asking for pity. We all love our countries but wish for a big difference, that is all.