As expected, I was lost, took the wrong train, went to different places, places that I shouldn’t be at, but what the hell, its part of experiencing something new, in fact, I enjoyed being lost, German people were too friendly, yes a bit cold by our standards, but friendly, so where did I go exactly?

Basically, I landed at Frankfurt airport, then took a train to Sieburg, which is a village that is close to Bonn, its full of old people, I guess I was the youngest there , the buildings were super nice, you can sense the quality of them, its so quite, you barely hear anything, but silence, silence rules which is nice for a change !
The difficulty was trying to talk to locals, the minute you start speaking English then answer in German, even if you tell them that you don’t understand German, they just keep going and going, so you have to listen to show some courtesy and then you say (Danka) which is thank you , end result is talking to them without getting what you want.

I called my Jordanian friend, Najwan, who lives in Koln, as she was my guiding light, I knew Najwan for almost 10-12 years, but didn’t see each other for like 8 years, and all of a sudden she was there, an hour away, what a small world.

Najwan took me to a lot of places, including the cathedral, which took around 750 years to be built, yes 750, of course that was on and off, of course I had try different kinds of beer, I hardly recall them now , no I wasn’t drunk its just that I tried almost everything.

Koln is a cosmopolitan city, full of universities and it’s a charming tourist city, I didn’t expect to see German people from different kind of races, you have everything from black to white, not to mention Marlin Manson freaks, with their cute and funny hair, green, yellow and blue colors, I have to say that I enjoyed talking to those people, never expected that, but they were entitlement, but they just couldn’t believe that I was from the middle east.

Night life was amazing too, although my dad nagged and nagged that I shouldn’t walk alone after midnight, of course I did the opposite, I went from one bar to another, good and quality ones to shitty ones, that is what I call traveling, trying everything and anything, 2 punks came to me at 4:30 am requesting money, I said I don’t speak German, then they asked in English with some hostility, at the back of my mind I was thinking, no way I’m going to give them anything and I was willing to do whatever it takes, hey we are Arabs, and no way I will let those bastards to take anything from me , so I said “Go away” the guy stared at me, I went closer to him and said “GO AWAY”, surprisingly, he moved back, then I was like, hmmm it would be nice to take a picture with them, so I said” lets take a picture”, I bet they felt they are some kind of celebrities , after taking the picture a gave them 2 Euros.
As for the cost of living, you can sense that Amman isn’t cheap at all, of course Germany is expensive but not that expensive, the main difference is the taxes, other than that it is so close.

I have to say that I have seen quite a lot of things at Koln, but still, I haven’t seen a lot, and maybe one day I will be back to Germany.

It all started when I got a job interview with www.detecon.de which is located in Germany, where I felt like, hey this could be a very good chance for me to get a great job, and gain some international experience and have the exposure too, things were slow, but as the days went by, and all of a sudden I was at the Germany embassy taking my Visa, not realizing that I’m traveling within (3) days!

The excitement is that I’m going to Germany for the first time, and I will definitely see things for the first time, such as museums, historical places and surly some pubs as well, but I’m a bit anxious because the whole flight is organized to the point that I shouldn’t miss any detail, I’m basically going to Frankfurt and then will take a train to Bonn, I have all the needed information but its all in German!!, so I asked a friend to translate the whole thing for me which he did, but I have to be really careful with my steps at Frankfurt airport, any wrong move would mean missing the train to Bonn.

Its true that sometimes timing is very important, in terms of meeting your deadlines or have a business meeting, when it comes to that I always fulfill my commitments, but in Germany things are organized to the point that the train is at 07:09 and not 07:10 or 07:05, so if you see someone in the news, having middle eastern looks and being chased by the German police, don’t think he is a terrorist, he is just someone who is trying really hard to catch up with the train !!!

I still lack information about Bonn, so I need to make a research about it now, otherwise I will be just like صعيدي في الجامعة الأمريكية

one thing to say, traveling is more an excitement than anything else for me, experiencing new things is always enriching in whatever aspect it is, one day I will pack things and go backpacking, I just don’t know when, maybe 10/10/2010

In general, Why Arabs do not respect the law?

In general, why Arabs tolerate corruption and favoritism? (Stunning, but it’s a fact)

In general, Why do we (Arabs) still have this internal conflict between; some wanting to move into modernization (Civic Society) and some wanting to move back to their roots (tribal society and/or religion)?

I would really like to know what do you think of these questions, and if you do have an answer please WRITE it

It all started when I met Salam at Sharm Sheikh (3) years ago, we hang out for about (4) months, then the relationship started, and after (1) we decided to open up the subject with her family, I was ready for it, and we even we started planning for our future and more importantly discussing the little details just like any couple wanting to get married. And so, she told me about her father and how liberal he is and always saying that this decision (marriage) is completely 100% for Salam.

So, I called her father and we agreed to meet at some café in order not to make it so formal as he wished, I started preparing for the meeting and writing down whatever questions he has for me, even unexpected ones.

And there it was, the meeting day. I have to say that I was very calm, a bit excited, I guess because I was confident of my own abilities and characteristics especially when it comes to meeting new people, but it wasn’t just a new person… knowing that he was a Palestinian refugee with no money at all, he created himself from absolutely nothing until he was some big shot general manager of a huge bank.

So I came to the café, I saw him and recognized him, I approached him and he greeted my like his own son, I talked about some unrelated matter, a positive one, I just don’t recall that now, then the interview started, it wasn’t really formal, I mean If I put myself in his shoes I would’ve asked a similar questions, like my background, my family, what did I study and when I graduated, where I work at? Whats my future plans? Where do I see myself in the future ? …etc then he asked me some unexpected questions like:

What do you think of women working ? what is religion to you ? what do you think of drinking? P.S: he wasn’t religious at all, and I think I managed to answer all the questions with an open-ended answers, such as working is an important part of life, even for women as it really can bring a real value for women by interacting with different people and handling all sort of problems, and such as I don’t have any problem with somebody drinking as long as it is a personal choice, as long as it doesn’t harm me then I’m ok about it.

In a way I felt I was applying for some Job, the meeting lasted for (3) hours and ended up with him saying you have to meet her (Salam) mother and brothers, hopefully soon. I have to say I felt great, I was honest, sometimes VERY HONEST some would view that a mistake but I would say I stand up for my own principles and one of them is honesty.

I called Salam and she almost broke in tears, feeling that there was a huge burden on her shoulders being taken off!!!
The very next day, there was a total shift in mood, her fathered wanted to have her brother to meet me and maybe provide a different opinion about me, So I met her brother and right from the start I knew where we are heading, It is rejecting me. And at the end of the meeting I looked him in the eye and said “by hook or crook I will get her, but without causing any harm for anybody”, maybe her brother thought I was just taken by the moment and being very frustrated and angry, but I absolutely meant every word I said.

Then her father requested not to contact me until he makes a final decision about me!! Of course she didn’t do that, simple we love each other in all the meaning the word LOVE entails.

After a week, he called me and said politely “Mafi Naseeb 3ami” I replied “thanks a lot 3ami”, to tell you the truth, I was up to any NO answer, not just I expected it but simply because I believe not everything comes easy, but as for Salam, it was so devastating, she couldn’t cope with it and she almost fainted. At that stage my role was to be supportive and sometimes very supportive, to tell you the truth its not easy to see your loved one cries and burst into tears almost all the time, but hey my girl is strong, its just another hurdle, isn’t it. Again, my primary role was to be supportive, but that isn’t easy, I mean you also need support, I guess the reason I managed it well because I tend to encourage myself by myself, most of the times I don’t want people to encourage me!

This lasted for at least 4-5 months, and I’m not gonna moan about anything, I’m strong enough to take it but not the strongest man on earth, I had a point where I could’ve taken some wrong decisions but I felt I’m deviating from the track, I had a plan and I’m willing to do whatever it take to be in a position where I want my self to be.

The reasons for rejecting me according to her father was the following:

1- I failed for 2 years in university and that isn’t a good indicator
2- Both families have a different background and most likely wont mingle well.
3- Career wise: I was in firm that directly works with the Iraqi army and he didn’t like that at all, plus I was new at my job (less than 3 months)
4- Social standard: my family is a middle class family while her is a rich family so its not really compatible.
5- Jordanian-Palestinian identity: I was Jordanian-Jordanian, she was Jordanian –Palestinian
6- Most importantly I’m not even close to his own standards, being her only daughter, he had high hopes and high standards of any future husband

The list is not over, and the story has a lot of details that I didn’t talk about maybe because I missed it or it needs hours of writing, however the breakthrough came today,

His wife (not her mom, as her mom passed 5 months after rejecting me (that was another dilemma for Salam) and he married some great women, a women that would take Salam’s side and would positively influence things) told him (after 1.5 years) that Salam is still in love with Me and she will speak to you. I thought that he will shout and curst things and explode but instead he was calm and said she is not young and she is old enough to make her own choices but I have to speak with her thoroughly about it because I have certain conditions!!!

Salam will speak to her father soon, and ill tell you what will happen

I’m sure that there are a lot of people facing even a more complicated things but I have a big advise, once you wont something don’t stop UNTIL you get it, and know that it consumes most of the energy and thinking but its worth it, just be strong because you’re a free person to take the choices you want, its your life, don’t let anyone control it (directly or indirectly), for some of your who are facing a similar condition, they may feel that they have a mountain to climb, well,,,, yes you have one, just face all the obstacles and most importantly plan things and be proactive, just don’t wait for things to happen because they wont happen by keep on waiting !

- Having not enough money to go to university and having only one scholarship for UNRWA student, He had to study even harder to get the scholarship, and so he got it, again if he wasn’t pushed to do that, he might never be enrolled in any good university and not even any university, so again it’s the blessin of suffering.

-After graduations, he worked as an employee in Kuwait for 12 years, then he decided to start up his own firm, he had no money but he had the most important thing, that is the human resources, simply he resigned and 50 other people resigned with him to start up his dream, he told them “I cant afford you, I simply have no money” they said “when you can you will”, I believe that he had a great influence on people and had a very good leadership and persuasive skills to start up his own dream, that is a big ARABIC firm, and so he did.

-The competition was fierce that he couldn’t afford any mistake, one mistake and he will be doomed, again that is the blessing of his suffering, and he is really thankful for that.

-On one occasion, he went to the Kuwait prime minister (abedel latif Sakr, If im not mistaken) claiming that they (Giant firms )are fighting him because they simply they do not want any ARAB company to emerge and break through.

Sakr asked him: “you don’t want them to attack your company?”
Talal replied: “Yes!”
Sakr asked: “and you don’t want them to spread any rumors and false information about your company”
Talal replied: “Yes!”
Sakr Said: “then go home and simply do nothing and I will guarantee you that no one will attack your or create any rumors about your company”
Talal was touched, and it was an inspiration for him when he heard that, knowing as long as hes being fought then he is on the right track because he is simply doing a great Job

-He sees problems as a chance to train your mind and grasp opportunities
He admits that he made a zillion mistakes throughout his life BUT he learned from them and that was one of his greatest advantages.
-The competition was fierce that he couldn’t afford any mistake, one mistake and he will be doomed, again that is the blessing of his suffering, and he is really thankful for that.
- “Intellectual Property” took some margin in the dialogue with the attendees, and I have to say I was really excited to know more about what does Intellectual property means in its broader aspect? But unfortunately the session ended here J, so I will be more than glad if someone could provide me with some insight about it according to your OWN understanding or perception about it.

And here I was, right on time for my appointment, at 13:00, but I ended up waiting for 20 minutes, I know that is not a lot for most of you, some people even say that its very hard for doctors to be on time, but hey, its not my fault, they simply told me at 13:00 so Im expecting to see the doctor at 13:00 or 13:10 max.

I went to the reception and gave them a decent lecture about being punctual saying that you told me to be here at 13:00 and at exactly 13:00 I was here, then why on earth should I wait for 20-30 minutes, they couldn’t say anything but your turn will come soon, so I realized that I need to see the manager, and so I did, after that, I was treated like a king , I didn’t want that, all I wanted is to have the doctor seeing my eyes on time as they informed me, or the least they could do is to apologize to me before I talk about to anybody. Anyways to cut the story short, I saw the doctor and made an appointment for the surgery.

The same thing happened on the day of the surgery, I came on time and they were late, again its not my fault and I can never tolerate such an act, some people would say “come on Bashar just let it go, Jordan is all about that” I’m sorry but if your letting it go and your fine about it then it is your issue, and the reason I’m doing that is that we will never change if we kept on accepting things as they are , don’t you think so? So while I was headed to the reception they simply knew that I’m gonna make a big fuzz about it probably they were thinking the bastard is coming so beware and before I speak one of them said “Mr Bashar, Could you go to the next floor!!”, I have to say they she perfectly read my mind and made the right choice for me.

The surgery took 6 minutes, was not easy to take but I needed to do it, simply because I didn’t like to put glasses anymore, for 2 simple reasons:
1- I feel that there is something sticking into my nose and I’m not comfortable about it anymore.
2- I kinda lose my confidence whenever I wear the glasses, a bit shocking for some people but its true for me, I simply feel that I’m a different person whenever I wear them.

After the surgery, the one thing I could ever do is to listen to the radio, which was something I never did before apart from listening to music, and hell it was, so boring, zero added knowledge, nothing really exciting to listen to , so I called some of my peeps, It was just a good chance to revive things with people I haven’t talked to in months.

Now I’m at the recovery stage, I can’t see really well especially seeing TV or reading things on the computer, the only thing I enjoy doing is writing a post, simply because I write fast and I don’t have to look at the screen.

My answer was “maybe some people are pursuing prosperity and development (Lexus) and the rest, which are the majority, are pursuing to retain identity and traditions (Olive Tree).

lets have your say in this

Lexus or olive Tree?

Click here.

When can we use violence?

I could’ve thought of a better answer than this :

“ I can use violence only when I know that there are no other means that could solve the problem” ….. but is there any problem that can not be fixed through diplomacy ???