Pinkwatching Israel’s statement calls them out on that. By claiming to be non-political they are making the very political decision to ignore the plight of the Palestinians. By claiming to be non-political, they are accepting the apartheid wall around Bethlehem, and the illegal Israeli settlements in Jerusalem. There is no such as thing as non-political. What these groups really mean is that they have the privilege of ignoring discrimination against Palestinians, and that they will take advantage of that privilege because their interfaith and LGBT “solidarity” efforts must fit within a specific agenda of Israeli occupation.

LGBT solidarity and interfaith dialog are admirable goals, and will certainly be a core part of creating a stronger, more just Middle East. However, true solidarity and dialog will not amplify one set of voices will continuing to silence the voices of the Palestinians. As an organization dedicated to amplifying all voices for change, Mideast Youth endorses this statement.

I think I started reading psychology in the year 2000 when I was about 15 years old. Psychology helped me a lot in understanding motives and ways of thinking of others, so that was a great help to me in my political activism. Also, a book I read before, about psychology of militarists for Sigmund Freud,, helped me dealing with militarists in my struggle for peace and non-violence. My activism led me to jail, so I thought to use the wasted time here in making a field study doing some psychological analysis for criminals jailed with me. I’ll try to summarize my major notices, categorize them, even knowing that these information could have been written before by researchers on criminology and psychology, but I believe that adding a new field-study from a prison in Egypt, made by a prisoner could be of a positive value.
* Sample of study
- About 30 prisoners (drug dealers, thugs, robbers, killers)
All came by military trials

1- Denial
* Denial was the greatest psychopath. I saw here criminals are living in a parallel world, different from reality.
* Nearly, every prisoner believes that he is innocent, everyone denies his crime. For moments, I felt that I’m the only one made things against the law. Some people claim that they didn’t commit their crime, but police faked the case to harm them. Others don’t see anything wrong with their crimes; just as the drug dealer who says that there is nothing wrong in selling narcotics (even he knows that it causes harm). Also, the killer who sees that it was a normal reaction from him to kill the person who insulted him or tried to get close to one of his females.
* One of the prisoners usually says “I believe that God would stand with me, because I didn’t harm anybody ever in my life”… This man killed, injured, hostaged, was jailed in lots of countries for more than 25 years and was active in trading drugs in more than 5 countries, in Europe and Middle East!
* As being with a group came by military trials in a very exceptional time, this made us very interested to follow the political news. Everyone was hoping that a political change could happen, leading to canceling military trials and freeing them. They can’t accept the idea that they harmed innocent people and deserve to be punished and rehabilitated in jail to be good citizens… But, look at it from another view, I, myself, don’t believe that I’m guilty, I don’t believe that I made anything wrong and I intend to continue my activism when I be released!

2- Schizophrenia
* Denial leads to having two identities; real one outside the prison and the other identity is the innocent one inside the jail and in front of investigators.
* I noticed also that most of criminals have two or three names. It’s common in Egypt to have two names (without a noticeable cause for that), but criminals have lots of names for lots of purposes. They use this variety to run from investigations and trials (as an accusation to Mr. A doesn’t lead to accusing Mr. B, when the investigator doesn’t know that Mr. A is Mr. B). Having two names helps them to hide their crimes from their families or any other people they don’t want them to know about their crimes. Also, having two names helps them escape from police officers and secret service.
* The direct result of having two names is having two identities (personalities) and you can be surprised at any second of changing in manners of the man in front of you. He just switches between both of them or switch on and off the other identity he doesn’t want to show in jail.
* Practically, when you deal with them, you find some of them faithful, religious, courageous, slightly enlightened… etc. But, all of that can change in seconds to see a selfish bloody person, full of hatred.
* Prisoners are also pretending all the time; pretending being rich is a common thing here. Lots of prisoners here pretend to be millionaires, they act as if they are going to buy you and your family. By time, you discover that they are poor people. Even if you didn’t get information proving they aren’t rich as they claim, their way dealing with money and how they fight for small and cheap things, make you believe that those people can’t have the amount of money they claim.

3- Lying
* Prisoners lie just for lying. One of them says a piece of a poet every day (the same piece); a part of it says, “tell me about prisoners and their lies; tell me about lies which run in their views”… Also, this man claims that he never lies, even though he lies every second!
* Prisoners don’t lie for a logical cause, they are just used to giving wrong answers as a normal reflex. They also feel power in deceiving others. They keep telling opposite (contradicting) stories about their lives. They tell false names for their sons. They could even claim of being sons of families, other than their true families.
* Dealing with prisoners taught me that you should believe that he is lying until he proves the opposite. You can’t deal with them as if they are telling they truth.

4- Ego
* Prisoners have enlarged egos. I think that the ego is the cause of all crimes. The man who kills another man because of a couple of words, the ego forced him to kill. The same with stealers and rapists. Ego is the mother of all crimes.
* The criminal doesn’t understand the idea of having borders between him and others. He sees it’s normal to interfere in others’ lives, insult them, use them, make fun of them, on the other hand, he can’t accept being treated the same way.
* Criminals also don’t believe in private property. When he sees something he likes, he just goes on and takes it (without a permission from its owner) and he doesn’t see something wrong with this. That’s why stealers don’t see something wrong in taking others’ money.
* Ego of criminals also gives them the impression that they have the right to use others and use them as slaves. When he wants something, he just orders any weak prisoner to do it. You need to have also an enlarged psycho-pathetic ego to make them fear you, and so fear of treating you the same way.

5- Complicated relation with religion
* I think this could be part of the schizophrenic point, but it has notices which should be focused on.
* Criminals have very fantastic opinions. They don’t see that Bin Laden did anything wrong. They don’t respect Jews or Christians in general (even though they respected me, thinking I’m a Christian). They hare non-believers and atheists. They are ready to kill or injure anyone telling them a bad opinion about their religion.
At the same time, they don’t pray nor fast. Their crimes (killing, injuring, stealing) are banned in their religions and they don’t see anything wrong in committing them. They use narcotics everyday, even they believe it’s forbidden by God.
* Criminals also are superstitious. They believe that dreams are messages from God which will come true. They feel good or bad when they hear specific types of birds. They believe in ghosts. They also believe in lots of myths not related to Islam.

6- Self-hatred
* This gets on surface when he is weak. It becomes obvious that he hates his life, his principles, may be even himself.
* When someone emotionally close to him tells him bad news, talk to him hardly, he starts blaming everyone led him to that crime, takes decisions to stop making crimes when he is released. Deep inside, he wishes if he had a different (regular/normal) life. Maybe, the hard time we live here in jail is the cause which makes him hates his crimes.

7- Sex-phobia and homophobia
* I believe it’s normal to be a homosexual when you are forced to live years without seeing a female. But, even if it’s spontaneous and good for them, they are still homophobic. When they know about a gay prisoner, they start insulting and beating him.
* But, this behavior isn’t related only to homosexual behavior, they nearly do the same thing towards whoever they know that he masturbates or owns sexual pictures with him.
* Schizophrenically, they like to talk a lot about their sexual adventures, with stimulant sexual details!

8- Continuous making of troubles
* Life in jail is very boring. Some prisoners will have to spend in prison 20 years or more. Egyptian prisoners have nearly nothing which can help you spend time without being bored. That’s how prisoners discovered a new way to kill time: making troubles.
* One of the prisoners told me, “the prisoner is a son of a bitch, if you gave him a finger, he will take you all, he will step on your head”… He was describing how prisoners deal with each other inside jail.
* The advantage of making troubles is that it kills lots of time and it brings with it lots of positive and negative feelings. They need those feelings while they are isolated by speechless walls.
That’s why prisoners fight each other every moment, interfere in others’ privacy, deliberately understand every word as an insult to use it to begin a fight… etc.
* Prisoners don’t know how to spend time positively and prison management doesn’t try to teach them how to do that. They don’t like to read newspapers or books. They usually aren’t interested in continuing their study from within jail.
* Long boring time and the inability to use it pushes them to use narcotics continuously to kill time and drugs make them make more troubles, and the cycle goes on.

- Final general notices

• Being a prisoner myself, made it hard for me to focus more than this. I wish I could make larger and more detailed research.
• Also, I felt changes in my behavior inside jail. Some changes are good adaptation, others are bad changes, I’ll need to visit a psychiatrist to fix them. What I’m trying to say is that in prison, there is a behavioral state affecting anyone inside and each prisoner is forced to take reaction towards it.
• Legally, there should be a psychiatrist and a social professional in jail to help prisoners. I don’t know if they exist, but if they do, we are not in contact with them in an way. This way in prison management doesn’t fight crime, but produces new criminals to society.

Maikel Nabil Sanad
El-Marg prison
18-5-2011

The psychiatrist present in the show basically affirmed that those persons could “be cured.” In November 2010, a facebook page invited people to rally for an LGBT pride in Tunisia on June 28. A few months later, the event was cancelled after a number of cybercitizens expressed strong disapproval and created several opposed pages. It seems that homosexuals are not generally discriminated against in Tunisian society but how far is this true? What do young people think about LGBT individuals?

I wrote a survey in which I posed some of the questions I wondered what Tunisians thought about and conducted it with the help of a number of friends in the first week of December 2010 and then in the first week of May 2011. We asked 141 students in those universities which brought together young people from all social classes from all over the country to tick the answers that best correspond to their opinions: Higher Institute of Management (ISG). Higher School of Commercial and Economic Sciences (ESSEC), Institute of Literary Studies and Human Sciences of Tunis (IPELSHT), Higher Institute of Techonological Studies (ISET), Faculty of letters and arts, Ecole Normale Supérieure de Tunis (ENS), Faculty of Human and Social Sciences of Tunis (FSHST), Institute of Advanced Business Studies (IHEC) and Higher Institute of Social sciences of Tunis (ISSHT). We had interesting discussions with many of them. Students are aged from 18 to 25 and answered the French version of the following survey:

This Questionnaire is anonymous.
Age: ……………. Sex : ………….. University: ………………………

1) What do you think about homosexuality (or bisexuality)?
- It’s repugnant
- It’s immoral. I don’t accept it.
- It’s an illness, a behaviour problem.
- It’s abnormal but I accept
- I accept homosexuality but not bisexuality.
- It’s totally normal just like heterosexuality. I perfectly accept it.

2) Do you know any homosexuals?
- Yes.
- Yes, unfortunately.
- No
- No, fortunately!

3) You think that people
- Are born homosexual
- Become homosexual

4) Homosexuals are:
- Just like everyone else
- Different
- Sick
- Perverts
- People who have problems integrating into society
- People who want to distinguish themselves from others

5) You think homosexuals
- Feel good
- Don’t feel good but live with it
- Suffer from a certain malaise and want to change

6) Are you for marriage between homosexuals?
- Yes
- No

7) Are you for the adoption of children by a homosexual couple?
- Yes
- No

8 ) In your opinion, how should society react to homosexuals?
- Execute them. We must absolutely put an end to this plague
- They are sick. Society and the government must help them receive treatment and get over it
- Accept them the way they are
- Grant them all the civil rights that heterosexuals enjoy

9) In your opinion, Society is generally,
- Intolerant
- Indifferent
- Tolerant

10) Your sister/brother announces to you that she or he is a homosexual. How do you react?
- You put an end to your relationship
- It shocks you and you take some time to accept it
- You try to change her or his sexual orientation
- It bothers you a bit but you do as if you learnt nothing new. It’s her/his private life
- You perfectly accept it

11) Do you think that SRS (Sex Reassignment Surgery or sex-change operation) should be facilitated for those who feel they belong to the opposite sex (transsexuals)?
- Yes
- No

12) Would you take part in an LGBT Pride in Tunisia?
- Yes
- No

13) Would you take part in an association whose goal is to defend homosexuals’ rights?
- Yes, I’d love to.
- Yes, why not.
- No, I don’t have time.
- No, I refuse

14) Does Islam condemn homosexuality?
- Yes
- NO
- Rather yes
- Rather no

15) You are rather
- Heterosexual
- Homosexual
- Bisexual

16) What if there are three genders (rather than two only: female and male)
- This is absurd
- That’s a weird idea
- I never thought about it
- This is interesting
- I totally agree
- I have always contested the classification of gender into two
- That has always been my opinion

Results:
Answers were really varied. A few of those who said they did not accept homosexuality said they accepted same-sex marriage. This probably means that they personally do not accept homosexuality and think it is morally wrong but do not mind or care whether homosexuals get married or not. Those who accepted adoption of children by homosexual couples did not always accept same-sex marriage. These students seem to think that homosexuals can provide children with a good and healthy upbringing just like everyone else but do not accept that homosexuality itself becomes recognized and tolerated in society. Others think that same-sex marriage is all right but that adoption of children by homosexuals leads the children to inevitably become homosexual themselves or have a behavioural trouble of any kind and think therfore that homosexuals should stay away from children or at least not be allowed to adopt children. Someone said that adoption can be allowed when the couple make sure children are also raised by someone else (a third person) who is heterosexual and from the opposite sex. A few people agreed with this idea. Some people refused the idea of becoming a member in an association for LGBT rights but said they would gladly take part in an LGBT pride or the contrary.

“It’s raining pink today; Israel must be washing its laundry,” I remarked to a friend after reading the below tweet from Scott Piro, an Israeli-American publicist, and self-proclaimed “social media denizen”.

Most importantly, Piro is the publicist for Tel Aviv Gay Vibe, a campaign by Israel’s Ministry of Tourism that seeks to market the city as a haven and top-line tourist destination for gays. This is in line with Israel’s strategy of exploiting queer rights to promote itself as “a lone outpost of freedom and openness in the Middle East”, while it continues to occupy Palestinians (painted as uncivilized homophobes) with impunity.

It’s needless to say that Tel Aviv Gay Vibe has been the subject of criticism by pro-Palestine and queer activists.

My initial alarm was over the tweet heralding the start of an even more aggressive pinkwashing campaign, but it wasn’t long before I began to harbour even greater concerns

Transparency

I was first introduced to Scott Piro through his work as a reporter and anchor for GayMiddleEast.com. Yes, the website that has been billed as the premier news source for all things gay in the Middle East.

While many were quick to regard GayMiddleEast.com as a credible and authoritative voice for LGBT issues in the Middle East, few have questioned the history of the site’s founding, and why a white British man is acting as its Editor and spokesperson.

GayMiddleEast.com was founded in 2002 by the Israeli Assaf Shabi Gatenio, and was until recently listed under an Israeli address. Its (overwhelmingly positive) coverage of Israel remains the most comprehensive – culminating in its coverage of the 2010 Tel Aviv Pride Parade, which was described as a “beacon of tolerance and acceptance”. The language of pinkwash.

Dan Littauer, the Managing Editor of GayMiddleEast.com and the media’s go-to-source for information on LGBT Arabs, is reportedly a dual British-Israeli citizen.

In a region where non-conformance (sexual and otherwise) is often regarded as a Western implant, even the least tenuous connection to Israel could lead to charges of treason. And herein lies the problem with GayMiddleEast.com; its refusal to be transparent.

Questions for GayMiddleEast.com

On a personal level, I take many issues with GayMiddleEast.com: its contribution to the narrative of hapless gays in need of saving, its scaremongering about the current uprisings in Arab countries, its fetishizing and exoticising of the LGBT identity – to name a few – but I do believe that the most pressing concerns that need to be addressed by GayMiddleEast.com are:

1) Why are activists not fully informed of GayMiddleEast.com’s Israel connection, so as to make informed choices about whether or not to get involved with the organisation?

2) Or better yet, why is the information not made publicly available on the website?

3) While GayMiddleEast.com claims to oppose pinkwashing, why have the grassroots campaigns by Palestinian queer activists to counter Israel’s pinkwashing been neither highlighted, nor endorsed?

On 1st April 1979, Iran voted by national referendum to become an Islamic Republic, and to approve a new theocratic constitution, whereby Khomeini became Supreme Leader of the country in December 1979. The great Persian civilization has suspended. Hundred thousands of secular, liberal, and socialist Iranian families have fled westwards in the aftermath of theocratization of Iran.  This small family is one of them.

Socialist Persian Mother, socialist Azeri father, and liberal prodigal son. The mother and son, pictured above, speak openly with Mideast Youth about their own efforts to outreach their fellow Iranians within the borders, and outside it. In addition to glimpses from the past, and thoughts about the future.

Two generations who share the dreams, aspirations and homesickness, however use two different languages, literally and figuratively.

Shahla, the mother, a digital and native refugee, is active offline. Meanwhile Dennis, the son, perfectly extends his mother’s activism and takes it to the online world throughout using the modern technology in order to spread the word about his country. Dennis, who puts the Iranian flag on his Facebook profile picture, works as a human connector between the strangled social media hubs in his home country from one side, and the world’s renowned media outlets from the other. Despite the generation gap, they both share an implied opinion; “Iran is under theocratic dictatorship, and if we don’t participate in altering this reality, who will do it?!”

Mother’s dream: A socialist revolution. She’s very blunt about it. Even democracy isn’t on her A-list, maybe because Ahmadinejad claims that he’s democratically elected, but socialism is!

Son’s dream: To trace his blood routes, visit his family and friends, and wander in the streets of free Tehran. He definitely knows the whereabouts of the digital #Tehran well, but he wants to touch its walls, plays football, his favourite sport, on its grounds, and talks in his mother tongue with relatives who he has never been able to meet in the coldness of the Nordic Sweden. The Islamic Republic is older than Dennis with 13 years, but he’s quite sure that he’ll live longer than it.

Shahla Nouri, a prominent member of Organisation for Women’s Liberation (OWL) – Iran, speaks in this interview, through her son who finds himself a Persian-English interpreter, as well as an interviewee throughout this podcast, about her organisation, and how they help women refugees from Iran and Kurdistan in Stockholm, where they live and operate. They also fight what they call the “gender apartheid” between men and women in Iran, help homosexuals of Iran, and spread awareness about human trafficking through their satellite channel which is received by many Iranians through cables.

“The organisation runs a lot of campaigns to stop stoning and execution of Iranian women in their homeland.” – Shahla Nouri.

OWL – Iran cooperates with a lot of anonymous active organisations in Iran, whose names can’t be announced, otherwise, the life of those operating the organisations would be threatened.

Shahla is burdened by memories which date back to 32 years ago, when she was forced to flee Iran in 1979, alongside her Kurdish political activist husband, and never returned back home. The family who has fled Iran 32 years ago, until they settled in Sweden 7 years later, after wandering through many countries in between.

“I want to see my homeland after 32 years abroad.” – Shahla Nouri

OWL was launched on 14th December 2002 in London, upon direct response to the growing women’s movement in Iran for equality and liberation The contemporary history of women’s movement in Iran dates back to the 1979 uprising, when their struggle and aspirations for an equal and just society for all was crushed by the newly empowered Islamic Republic of Iran, which didn’t hesitate since then in showing their alter ego, especially against women.

“Women were the first social strata of the society to be suppressed by the Islamic regime. The imposition of Islamic laws, such as the compulsory veil, gender segregation in public places, negation of the right to divorce or custody of children for women, and the subsequent punishments for defying these laws, such as arrests, imprisonment, stoning and execution have all made life a hell for millions of women in Iran.” – OWL – Iran official website.

There’s a growing women’s movement to combat suppression and humiliation in Iran. Today, a lot of  Iranians are very vocal when it comes to freedom, equality, separation of religion from state, and an end to sexual apartheid, whether outside or inside the borders, however the latter population need a proxy and a creative pseudonym. OWL is overwhelmed with reform, and merged in this movement overseas.

“We regard political Islam as one of the main obstacles in the path of women’s movement for change, especially in the Middle Eastern countries.” – OWL – Iran.

The organisation’s founder and director is the prominent activist Azar Majedi, well-known for her freedom and equality efforts. I was honoured to read one of OWL‘s publications, and I was really amazed by Ms Azar’s deep analysis and insightful approaches.

Check out OWL’s official website here.

On the other side of the table, stays Dennis, the interpreter and the son, who has just finished his high school in Sweden, the country where he was born and raised for all his life.

Dennis, soon to turn 20 year old, has refused, prior to recording, to declare his full name, because that would put his family and extended family at risk.

Dennis, an Iranian-Swedish who has only navigated to his homeland through Google Earth, talks in this podcast about how he used social media in the 2009 presidential elections in Iran, and how he helped decrypting the social media news leaking from behind the Mullah-Firewall, and defusing them into the internationally recognized media outlets. Smuggled news were the world’s media headlines during the presidential campaign, however the state controlled propaganda strived to label the foreign news sources as conspirators and spies.

We can see through this family, how two different, yet united, generations, share an old struggle against an oppressive regime in their homeland by connecting the offline and online worlds together – Streetbook, as my English friend would like to call it.

The last question to both of them was about their future dreams. The emotional Shahla couldn’t help her tears, while uttering, “revolution!” But at the end, they both shared laughs while spelling their website domain on the Internet – an Iranian internal joke apparently.

Listen to this podcast with this small, yet strong, Iranian family, or download it now!

Check out our newest projects, Ahwaa, a safe and dogma-free space to debate LGBTQ-related issues in the MENA region!

Can someone please explain this logic?

Check out the debates on homophobia in the region at Ahwaa.org.

I had a rough day and I really felt like going out. I called up a friend of mine to see if he would like to go out with me to the “Queen Boat” – a boat that is docked on the bank of the Nile River off the Island of Zamalek, opposite of the Marriot hotel. My friend said that he was tired and in no mood to go out. He suggested that his house mate and our mutual friend go out with me instead because he had had a really bad day. Our friend Fadi was fired from his job simply for being Christian and could not do anything about it. Fadi was reluctant at first but I kept pestering him until he agreed to go out with me. We agreed that we will meet there, outside the boat. I finished up getting ready and then took a cab to the boat. Fadi was waiting for me, it was a little before midnight. We greeted each other with the usual kiss on each check. We walked across the path way from the sidewalk to the docked boat. The boat had 3 levels, the club was at the bottom level. We went down the stairs, paid at the entrance and entered the club. Music was blaring, some people were dancing, others were at the bar. As we walked to our seats I remember thinking that it was unusually empty. Usually there would be a lot more men at this hour on a Thursday night. I didn’t think much of it and continued walking to our seats. We ordered a couple of beers, Fadi started smoking, we chatted, looked around….

After a while more people started arriving but it was still not as “packed” as it usually is. There were male couples dancing together sensually and seductively on the dance floor, there were guys mingling at the bar…I remember thinking to myself – nobody can miss this is a “gay place”. I leaned over to my friend and said “I wonder what the waiters & bartenders think about all this – they must know that we’re gay…” Eventually, my friend got up to go to the restroom and “cruise around”. He left his cell phone and cigarettes on the table. I stayed behind and continued drinking and people watching. I recognized two people – my ex-boyfriends ex and the British principal of the school I used to work at. I’m not sure if they saw me too but I didn’t make any effort to say hello to them.

After a few minutes, people started walking off the dance floor, the music was turned down and bright lights came on. That was really strange – I looked at my watch (can’t recall exactly what time it was) and I remember thinking its still way too early, is the club closing already? I stopped a waiter and asked him what was going on. He said in a monotone as a matter-of-fact: “The police came and they arrested folks…its happened before.” My heart sank, I gripped the arm chairs with my fingers tensely. I looked around. There were still some guys at the bar and waiters were walking back and forth. I could not see anybody in police uniform. Thoughts were racing through my head. What the fuck am I gonna do? Did Fadi get arrested? Shit! Shit! I got up, paced back and forth thinking, what am I gonna do, what am I gonna do? I called my mom-she was staying at her mothers house that night. I just needed to hear her voice. I did not tell her what was going on or where I was. I told her I loved her, wished her a good night and hung up. I stopped pacing. My heart was beating quickly, my hands were starting to sweat. I looked down at the table where I was sitting. Fadi’s cell phone and cigarettes were still there. A waiter approached me and asked if what was on the table was mine. I said no, they belong to my friend and I’m going to take them to him. He said in that case we need to write down your name and number because when they (the men) are released they usually come back looking for their stuff. He went to the bar, I picked up Fadi’s things and walked towards the bar. I remember thinking to myself, I can’t give them my real name or number. But what if they ask to see my ID? Shit! Oh maybe I can just tell them I don’t have my ID on me….

I told the waiter my name was Assem Seif (thinking that was ambiguous enough, I certainly wasn’t going to give them my last name which was quite uncommon) and I changed the order of some of the numbers to my cell phone number. The waiter wrote the information down and luckily did not ask to see my ID. I remember thinking to myself, ok I’m going to do this, I’m going to try to leave. What else am I going to do? Was the police going to come back and arrest the rest of the people? Were they still here or did they leave? My whole body was so tense and my heart was still beating very fast.

I walked toward the door that would lead me to the stairs to go up to the ground level. As I got to the door, there were two men standing there (not in police uniform) and there was another guy who was also trying to leave. One of the men asked me, “What do you do (for a living)?” I responded: “I teach.” He asked, “What do you teach?” I said “English (as a second language).” The man wasn’t looking at me as we talked, he was looking behind me, his eyes searching the place. Suddenly the other man standing at the door yelled in Arabic: “I saw you dancing and gyrating your hips (like a woman) on the dance floor!” as he slapped the man standing next to me. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I did not react, I was in shock. The man let me through and I climbed up the stairs to the ground level. There were about two other men there from the club and other men that seemed to be undercover cops. I started pacing back and forth and then I said I’m going to try to get out of here. I asked someone, “Can we leave?” He said, “Didn’t the ‘pahsa’ (a high rank officer) ask you to wait?” I said, “The ‘pasha’ did not tell me anything.” And just like that I started walking towards the path that leads from the boat to the street. I really do not know where I got the courage to respond in that way. I got to the path, I did not look back and kept walking. I said to myself ‘walk confidently and slowly, don’t look nervous then maybe they won’t suspect anything and won’t arrest you.’

I managed to get to the street. Out of the corner of my left eye I noticed a police van and police officers in uniform. I did not look at them and kept walking on the sidewalk and eventually to the street. I did not look back. I crossed under the 26th of July bridge and turned right towards Ahmad Mazhar street. I took out my cell phone and called my friend that I called earlier. When he answered, I said, “Maher, the police came to the Queen boat and they arrested people. They arrested Fadi. Did Fadi connect with you at all?” He said no. I said, “He told me he was going to the bathroom but he never came back.” He asked me what I was doing and I said I’m walking home. I hung up. I looked behind me – it appeared that nobody was following me. I remember breathing heavily, my heart was still pounding. I started increasing my pace and kept saying over and over “Oh my God! Oh my God! Oh my….”. I eventually really picked up the pace and started running. I ran home. I remember reaching my building, climbing up 4 flights of stairs, opening the door to my familys apartment and closing it behind me. I locked the door, walked to the hallway, opened the door to my sisters room – she was still awake. I told her what happened and I told her not to tell our mother about it. I did not want her to worry. I really can’t remember my sisters reaction. I remember walking out of her room, walking into my mothers room (I was sleeping there that night). I called Maher again. He said he was going to go down and look for Fadi at the ‘Kasr Al Aini’ police station. I told him I still had Fadi’s phone and cigarettes. I hung up. I remember changing into my pajamas in complete and utter shock. It was as if my mind and body were completely separated. My body was doing one thing (taking off and putting on clothes) and my mind was doing another – replaying what just happened and thinking “Is the police still going to come after me? Are they gonna find me? Are they gonna know where I live? Are they gonna torture Fadi to get my contact information?” When I was done changing I got into bed and under the covers. I crawled up into fetal position, closed my eyes tight and started praying/reciting versus from the Koran. And somehow I fell asleep.

Fortunately, I was never arrested. I really do not know how I managed to flee unscathed that night. It was truly a miracle. The other men who were not so lucky, including my friend Fadi, (I found out later) were tortured at the police station and were forced to sign depositions that they were gay, devil worshippers and part of a satanic cult. Some men were raped by foreign objects or by other male police officers. Some were electrocuted. Some had vicious dogs set on them. Some were hung upside down and beaten with a stick on the soles of their feet. And of course as if all this was not enough, they were all verbally abused and humiliated. They were called faggots amongst other derogatory names. As the men were being raped, the officers would say, “So you like being fucked, well here you go…”. After a few nights at the police station they were transferred to prison. Their crime: debauchery, fabricating verses from the Koran, conducting “gay weddings” on the boat, participating in orgies on the boat, being part of a satanic cult…. Their face pictures, full names, age, professions amongst other identifying information were published in almost all the newspapers and magazines…..

I managed to leave Egypt on August 2nd 2001. I was able to seek asylum based on my sexual orientation and the events of May 11 2001. I have been living in the San Francisco Bay Area ever since. Last year I became a US citizen and was able to visit Egypt for the first time in 9 years. Some of the “Cairo 52” men were released, some were imprisoned for 6 months, a year, 3 years – one person was sentenced to 5 years in prison. Some men managed to flee the country to France, USA, Canada…

IDAHO is celebrated around the world, and Lebanon is no exception. The country might not seem like the perfect environment for gay activism, but recently there has been a lot of related buzz. Some Lebanese activists have started an inspiring blog where homosexuals and their friends can share stories about how homophobia affects their daily lives. The stories are beautifully written and accompanied by creative banners crafted by local artists. Additionally, a group of gay rights advocates have put up flyers in some areas of Beirut. It aimed to question people’s perception of homosexuality and get them to notice the damage caused by homophobia. The messages ranged from discrimination at the workplace, to death threats by family members and the current state of Lebanese law that criminalizes homosexuality under claims of ‘unnatural intercourse’. The campaign was well received, attracting public attention and interest on the blogsphere.

Helem , a Lebanese LGBT rights NGO, is organizing an event for the occasion on the 22nd of May. It will include documentary screening and panel discussions. The main theme for this year’s event is the rejection of all forms of discrimination against LGBT individuals.

The Lebanon IDAHO blog :
Leb IDAHO blog

Coverage of the street campaign:
Streets of beirut speaking loud against homophobia
We’re going to the streets

Helem event page:
Helem IDAHO event

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